It is someone you can get away with drunk texting on Friday night from a bar after your fifth cocktail.

It can be someone who you would never date for various reasons (he rides a motorcycle, he eats crackers in bed, he’s a Republican, etc., etc.), but whom you nonetheless love getting naked with on occasion.

He answers bluntly: “The Count.” It’s his measure of how many girls he’s hooked up with since Harvard began—half a semester ago. So, what’s wrong with two people agreeing to get mutual pleasure from each other without emotional attachment? Whenever we hold hands, make intense eye contact, or have sex, we increase the concentration of oxytocin in the brain (sometimes up to 500 percent).

I would have thought it was a joke if he hadn’t begun reviewing the previous night’s expedition with his friend—two hangovers have better memory than one. Oxytocin makes us trust one another and form deep, affectionate bonds.

Furthermore, every touch, every kiss, and every orgasm releases the neurotransmitter dopamine, which increases desire for something.

When we release it during sex, we want to have more sex.

When people have casual sex, they are consciously acknowledging that another’s body is just a means for self-satisfaction, a basic tool for personal gratification.

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