So how do you determine the best way to love that tough person? If you own your part of the problem, the other person will be more likely to accept your boundaries. Invite them to change – The first step in confronting someone should never be a limit, but always an invitation to change. Warn them – If you just set limits out of the blue, this person may feel ambushed and become angry at you. Patience means providing the ingredients for growth while allowing that person time to respond. Follow through with consequences – Remember that consequences have nothing to do with anger, revenge, or punishment.
Place a “2” next to the questions that apply to you. When people criticise me, I accept what they say as true and feel bad about myself. I often think about mistakes I have made and feel bad about myself. If you have scores that are of concern, either send me a comment or find a good counsellor to address the issues raised, especially if the results were 10 or more.Learning to set healthy personal boundaries is necessary for maintaining a positive self-concept, or self-image.It is our way of communicating to others that we have self-respect, self-worth, and will not allow others to define us.We have been looking at the Family of Origin influences on Personality issues when it comes to handling conflict solutions. 10 or more = We would encourage counselling for problems.Here is another Personal Worksheet to assess your personal boundaries. It does help to print off the worksheets before you answer the questions. My parents frequently shared intimate secrets with me. , pages 115-116.) This worksheet is not designed to give you a diagnosis of any problems in your life.